Could be, you know. http://ift.tt/1eK4diW
*me eating something*: this taste like ass
mom: how do u know what ass tastes like lol
"You’re the straightest gay guy I kn-"
"You’re not like those other gay people who go to those awful pride para-"
"You’re gay? Then why don’t you hit on me or other gu-"
It’s usually the selfish people who are loved the most. They do what you deny yourself, and you love them for it. You give them your heart. — Saul Bellow (via misswallflower)
dads on vacation
(Source: staygoldifnothingelse, via hellyeahsupermanandwonderwoman)
I asked my brother for a glass of water and he brought me back a cup of ice and said “wait”
My mom knows Santa omfg
she smooth suckin ya fatha dick
while Santa sets up the sex swing in the basement.